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The Woman’s Guide to Younger Men
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The Woman’s Guide to Younger Men

Nitin Agarwal

Older women and younger men enjoy equal, open, and exciting relationships. As one forty-seven-year-old divorcee with a twenty-eight-year-old lover says, “Younger men are just more fun.”
It might be time to “think again” about younger men.
If you can’t imagine yourself with a younger man, let your values, aspirations, and interests guide you. If you are open to a different kind of relationship, a younger man will appear in your life.

I often awake to find Beverly, my older wife, wrapped around me like a Virginia creeper. In the nineteen years since we met, she has shown me what true love is, and I couldn’t live without it. For the first time, I have someone who wants me as much as I want her.


Falling in love with an older woman is the best thing I ever did, and I’m not alone. The percentage of women marrying younger men doubled over the past two decades, and women marrying for the second time are seven times more likely to marry a younger man.
Listen to women with younger lovers or husbands and you’ll hear:
” We’re a perfect fit,”
” He accepts me as I am,”
” He keeps me young,”
” I liked it on top.”
If you haven’t discovered the joys of a younger man, it’s probably cultural. If it’s an older man with his second (or third) wife, you’re not alone. Hollywood is run by men, so it’s hard to escape their fantasies.
Older women and younger men enjoy equal, open, and exciting relationships. As one forty-seven-year-old divorcee with a twenty-eight-year-old lover says, “Younger men are just more fun.”
The first step in finding the right partner is to know more about yourself. Think about people, places, objects, issues, hobbies, careers, and organizations.
Close your eyes and imagine your ideal soulmate. (Careful, this doesn’t mean ignoring your feelings, denying deeply held beliefs, or trying to change someone else).
This may seem like a curious way to find a mate, but sometimes we’re too busy living our lives to question whether it’s the right life. Think about what you really want, not what you think you should want. This might include raising a family, succeeding at your career, building a business, fighting for an issue, or finding a spiritual community.
Imagine the ideal partner for your younger self. It might be time to “think again” about younger men.
Let your aspirations, values, and interests guide you if you can’t imagine yourself with a younger man. The best way to find someone worthwhile is to become the person you always wanted to be. By being good to yourself and others, you help people become better and you attract better people.
Visualize doing something with your soulmate (no, outside the bedroom). Building homes for poor families? If you’re looking for the right person, you can meet your ideal partner anytime, anywhere, doing almost anything.
The most important thing is to be yourself rather than pretending to be someone you think others will want. Remember the “rules” for women that advised: “Don’t talk to a man first” and “Don’t call him and rarely return his calls”?
Start by being less concerned about whether a man is older, wiser, richer, taller, or all the things you might have wanted when you were sixteen. The most important thing about a man is his character. Younger guys may need guidance, but we all teach others how to treat us, and older women are better teachers.
No matter what your age, you don’t need to change the world to find love, sometimes all that has to change is you. A younger man will appear in your life if you are open to a different kind of relationship. It happens all the time.

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